I DO NOT HAVE AN EATING DISORDER P01
I’ve been having some pretty intense internal arguments about whether or not to start posting this, but finally bit the bullet. Last year I was diagnosed with anorexia, which I’ve apparently had for most of my adult life. While I’m still very much in the process of recovery (still sort of in the process of even accepting that I may have a problem, actually), I’ve been using a variety of tools to try to wade through the sea of emotional craptasticness that this has unearthed. After I started taking anti-depressants, for months I couldn’t draw. I felt like my hands had been cut off. By starting to work on a story, I was able to focus enough to get my hands moving again (you can see a lot of brilliantly crappy artwork as I work my way out of the slump). I started to find this exercise therapeutic (in conjunction with, you know, actual therapy), as attempting to define my thoughts and actions for the page has forced me to examine them more closely. And on the other side of the coin, regular sequential art is supposedly a much better way to improve your drawing style than just sketching random naked ladies and animals (I swear I keep those two subjects separated most of the time).
I’ve got a decent backlog to work with, so am planning to post weekly. I apologise in advance for any offense as this is a sensitive topic, and my experience is in many ways not typical to other ED sufferers. I can only go with what I know. Being confronted with how many lies I’ve learned to tell to cover up my habits is pretty shocking, so now I’m trying to be honest.
Edit: I feel the need to clarify something. The views put forth in this first page of the comic are extremely close-minded. They reflect what I thought I knew about eating disorders before I was diagnosed. I acknowledge that these views are pretty awful. As I’ve worked on this journey of recovery, I’ve learned a lot about eating disorders, and one of the things I’ve learned is just how wrong my initial assumptions were. Eating disorders have nothing to do with vanity. They don’t discriminate - they can affect anyone, of any age, gender, social status, race, belief. Eating disorders are legitimate mental illnesses, and they deserve to be treated with respect, attention and compassion. I sincerely apologise if my immature views represented in this page of the comic are triggering for anyone.